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Army Fluff The Host of Poneextlan

Discussion in 'Fluff and Stories' started by Tlac'Natai the Observer, Dec 14, 2015.

  1. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    I've been inspired by others of the forums doing character backgrounds, and I feel like this will help my audience better understand the story I have going so far. The story is about Ezhno, so I won't do one for him, but the moment in time that Ezhno is born is pretty critical to this desert valley.

    The city, Poneextlan, was commissioned in secret by the Old One, Uxmac the Messenger. It lies in the high deserts of southwestern Naggaroth.

    Tlac'Natai

    The valley knows relative peace (in warhammer terms) for almost all of its history, thanks to a well placed city at the hands of Uxmac. Tlac'Natai is in fact a First Generation slann, but due to ages of confinement, operates on the level of a Fourth Gen. Tlac'Natai has been tasked by the Old One, Uxmac, to do nothing more than observe the world and report regularly into the cosmos. Uxmac also gifted Tlac with sight through a large phoenix, which was marked by a second pupil in his left eye. Tlac'Natai has spent many ages watching the world turn, all while sitting in the safety of temple walls. Tlac has never lead an army in any way, dutifully fulfilling his task.

    While the phoenix burns in its chambers, where it will be reborn, Tlac'Natai shakes the city in an effort to send his report into the cosmos. Reports include the movement of large armies on their conquest in distant lands; all is seen by the high flying phoenix. Every century or so, Tlac'Natai will submit a report on his opinions of the direction of the world. This report takes weeks to send, and details the patterns that the lesser races are making and why the patterns might be the way they are (mini ice ages pushing populations one way, constant rains drawing the worst kind).

    Ahtunowhiho

    Leader of the Host of Poneextlan. A hot headed Skink Chief, Ahtunowhiho is young for a general at 25. Even though his birth was not a single spawning, since the day of spawning, it was clear he was the Alpha of the bunch. Ahtunowhiho has worked his way up the ranks tirelessly to reach the point of general, in times, proving himself to saurus. Ahtunowhiho has earned the respect of many by one way or another, he is always one to take care of the fellow.

    Ahtunowhiho has accomplished a few good things already. He has constructed a network of landing zones for terradons, which doubles as being used for supplies. The landing zones, being scattered throughout the desert, offer quick air support where ever needed. Ahtunowhiho has also set a higher standard on beast handling. Beast pens are standardized for bunk living, and beasts are expected to hunt for their own food with skink patrol chaperons. Ahtunowhiho likes to have every aspect of his army at its peak.

    Ahtunowhiho is obsessed with the legend of the rogue scar veteran, Huaroq who was last seen riding his carnosaur north, to The Rim. Ahtunowhiho's nemesis has always been the Apisi, beastmen who come from the top of The Rim, and he believes that Huaroq is still alive, haunting the rim country. Ahtunowhiho has made many motions to lead an expeditionary force into the rim country, but has been denied as it is against the code of Poneextlan to venture that far.

    I'll post about more characters whenever I can, or whenever there's one to be added (buying new models all the time still)
     
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2015
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  2. Tziruzitza
    Skink

    Tziruzitza Member

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    An interesting group! Some really nice (and different) ideas in here - good stuff. It's always nice to see what life outside the jungle is like, too :)
     
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  3. spawning of Bob
    Skar-Veteran

    spawning of Bob Well-Known Member

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    Cool stuff. Inclusions the Outer Rim Territories makes it typical L-O!

    I didn't get the mechanics of Tlac's reporting process. If it is to come out in detail on a story, I can wait, though.
     
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2015
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  4. thedarkfourth
    Kroxigor

    thedarkfourth Well-Known Member

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    I *really* love the idea of a carnosaur that haunts beastmen.

    Although in naggaroth wouldn't dark elves be the much greater concern? I confess I haven't visited in a while but they used to be all over the place...
     
  5. Bowser
    Slann

    Bowser Third Spawning

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    This isa great primer, definitely gives more insight to Atunowhiwho! Great stuff here!
     
  6. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    In my story, the northern parts of Naggaroth are dominated by Dark Elves, and in the south is where the climate gets hotter and they haven't settled those lands. I took some creative liberties in changing the landscape of Naggaroth =).

    As far as the transmissions to the stars go, the entire city IS the radio that Tlac'Natai speaks through. Question for you guys though, how long does a phoenix live for in this universe?

    I should also note that this desert lies between a small sea of sand to the south, and a drastic increase in elevation known as The Rim. The desert is full of little lifeless hills that break up the mostly flat landscape. Poneextlan sits in a valley created by these low-rising hills.

    I'm glad you guys had some questions, I like fleshing out this desert setting for everyone =)
     
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  7. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    The Senate, while not a character, deserves an installment. It hasn't been mentioned at all in the first story as it had no part to play, but in my next story, it plays a huge part.

    Tlac'Natai likes to observe; it is more of a hobby than a job. Tlac takes no part in governance and is more like a citizen than a ruler. Early on, Tlac put the Senate into place so that the city could run itself. Every Skink, Saurus, and Kroxigor gets to vote. There are 30 seats in the Senate chamber, all in an open air forum. While the members are mostly Skink Priests, it isn't uncommon to have a Skink Chief or Saurus (Kroxigor barely use their vote, they have never been known to even run for a seat). Deliberations take place every 2 weeks and last for 1-2 days. When talks reach a stalemate, there are extreme cases that the Senate has agreed to call upon Tlac'Natai to weigh in.

    The Senate has implicated its own legal system, without the influence of Tlac'Natai. They also act as the judge and jury in court cases, and will amend laws when they find flaw in old ones. The Senate keeps itself busy making Poneextlan run smoothly.

    Civil matters are not all that keeps the Senate busy, but also military affairs. While the military is it's own entity from the Senate, the Senate has its hand in what they can and cannot do. The largest restriction is that armies cannot march into The Sands to the south, nor past The Rim to the north. Supplies are granted to the military by the Senate; the Senate taxes material goods rather than currency.

    Dutiful as any of the First, Senators serve until death, often at the hands of another Senator (in sanctioned combat, corruption isn't commonplace).

    That's about all I have so far on the Senate. There won't be any character within the Senate that stands out.
     
  8. Slanputin
    Carnasaur

    Slanputin Well-Known Member

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    Somewhere between the lifespan of a spark and the age of a Sun. i.e. feel free to take as many liberties as you can with the fluff - you could just invent a sub-species to fulfill your needs. Certainly, I'd imagine the phoenix in WFB probably reach into "hundreds of years" in terms of age, but the last HE book describes how Frostheart phoenix are those approaching the end of their life, which rules out immortality.
     
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  9. Scalenex
    Slann

    Scalenex Keeper of the Indexes Staff Member

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    I like the idea in general, the ancient literature Realism attacks it. Naggaroth is cold and wet and barely habitable for all but the hardiest life. Your desert is dry and hot and barely habitable for all but the hardiest life. You need to come up with a good reason why there isn't an ecotone between the two areas that's a temperate land of plenty where most people would live if they could. My suggestion, mountains. Tall jagged mountains, possible some volcanoes and dragons and potatoes! Take that Realism! I have your number.



    I like your tike to Uxmat (or is it Uxmac?). It fleshes out a lesser Old One and defines your Slann apart from all the generic Slann.

    Second question: Does he have to be First Generation? I don't want to be that guy whose like "but the canon says" since GW plays fast and loose with their canon so we should not draw lines in the sand that cannot be crossed. Still if his power level is that of a 4th generation Slann why make him First generation? That seems a bit Mary Sue-ish. Okay that's too harsh. "Mary Sue" is almost fighting words. Let me rephrase. Your writing skills are so well-polished that you do not have to resort to uses an unique demographic to make your character unique.

    Also saying this First Generation Slann has the power level of a Fourth Generation Slann is a bit too crunchy. "His power level is over niiiiine thoussssssaaaaaaaaaaannnnnndddddd!" I would describe your Slann in non-numerical terms. Instead of saying First Generation I'd leave it vague and say "One of the oldest living Slann" and keep it vague. As for merely the level of a Fourth Generation Slann you could write a description of his power and activity level.

    You can pick what literary direction you want to go. Is he a "weak" Slann because he was disinterested in the world? Did the Old Ones create him with limited power so as not to interrupt his observances? Did he start as an exceptionally mighty Slann and atrophy over the years? If you subtly develop your character and later have the Slann open a can of whupass on the foes of the Old Ones you can decide which direction to go. Is it a sleeping giant waking up for the first time or is it the last heroic charge of grizzled old veteran or did the Slann equivalent of a book nerd get provoked into a rage?
     
  10. Scolenex
    Ripperdactil

    Scolenex Well-Known Member

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    No it's not. Scalenex has too much decorum to bring up that argument but I can be blunt.

    Mary Sues, for not familiar for the term is a somewhat derogatory term for a character in fan-fiction (sometimes regular fiction) that seems too perfect, too good. One of the biggest things considered Sue-ish is a Mary Sue character is being a wish fulfillment character for what the author wishes to be like, an avatar of the author's aspiration. That normally insulates L-O from Mary Sues or Marty Stus or Gary Stus because our characters are amphibian/reptile hybrids. Few people aspire to be giant space frogs. We want to be good looking awesome well-liked humans...or cuddly pandas. still I just would like to point out that Tlac'Natai the Observer is his user name and literally author avatar.

    That means Tlac'Natal the Slann will be under the proverbial microscope for any signs of Sue-ness. Use kid gloves.

    Scalenex's first attempt at science fiction done at about 13 or 14 involved a lot of different space aliens. His favorite race the Appotanians had a mythical hero named Scalenex. While he is too embarrassed to release a story with such a one-dimensionally perfect character now that he's almost 33, he still uses "Scalenex" as his online handle for nostalgia and to remind him to keep writing.
     
  11. spawning of Bob
    Skar-Veteran

    spawning of Bob Well-Known Member

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    You know a lot about bamboo, Scolenex. Is there something we should know?
     
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  12. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    So, I'm basing every bit of this desert in the image of the Phoenix valley, and Arizona is mostly part of the Rocky Mountain Range, so that's exactly what I had in mind. I never explained it fully, but you caught on perfectly. The Apisi inhabit everything north of The Rim, which is where the "Rocky Mtns" would start; in effect separating these Children of the First from the Dark Elves. Maybe this isn't giving Dark Elves enough credit though? Would they care to explore some nothingness of rock and sun? after passing through some rough mountains that have coyotes attacking you day in and day out in organized ambushes? Maybe they are that hardy of explorers, I just feel like Lustria really held more riches in every aspect, and this area wouldn't be a top priority.

    I feel terrible, you're right. I have scribbles and notes with both written hahaha oops. As for the slann, I don't detail it as "First Generation", but it is assumed since Tlac'Natai had met the Old Ones, and knows they're real. The 4th Gen part is definitely from atrophy; he's a thinker, not a doer. Also @Scolenex guessed it, very much an avatar of myself, but to be fair, so is Ezhno and Ahtunowhiho. They all just represent different personas I have, or that I perceive in myself at least. A little tid bit, the whole eye thing i.e. see my portrait, is real too. I had a dream where I looked in the mirror and saw a perfectly formed iris and pupil in the corner of one of my eyes. Odd dream, never have found out the meaning, but apparently it's been a great motivator for me in terms of inspiration.
     
  13. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    I want it to live forever, so long as it doesn't die in battle, or through some other more complicated mechanic. I was thinking something like 4 months in between rebirths seemed reasonable, it lets Tlac submit a report every season. I do mention in the first story that the gecko must die in a furnace in order to maintain the potency of its life, when it's reborn. The same principle is used for the phoenix, it has it's own chamber that can be sealed and it's a big oven in the temple essentially. I'm calling this sufficient for Phoenician immortality =D. It flies incredibly high, almost like a satellite , and is always under the sun. I imagine a phoenix would also have impeccable eyesight much like eagles in real life, giving Tlac all the visual information he can handle.
     
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  14. spawning of Bob
    Skar-Veteran

    spawning of Bob Well-Known Member

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    Someone correct me if I'm wrong. There were no sideburns (autocorrect FTW! Should read spawnings) of Slann after the Old Ones departed. Therefore all generations overlapped with the old ones (although they may hot have had personal dealings)

    I could imagine Tlac as being one of the last (even THE last) to be spawned, giving Uxmac credit for having foresight of a time when the Old Ones might not have first hand info about the world.
     
    Last edited: Dec 20, 2015
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  15. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    I couldn't tell you where I got that idea, it's a good thing I didn't plan to mention those kind of specifics in the actual story haha. Thanks though, I should keep tally of the times you correct me =P
     
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  16. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    I haven't updated this in a while. Today I want to touch on the legend of Huaroq, and Tadi, the terradon rider.

    I'll tell the Legend of Huaroq through Ahtunowhiho, in front of his troops in the camp.

    Huaroq was our last great general. After revolutionizing the way we fight, Huaroq went on to commission the forts we still use today. They say that Huaroq had the mind of a skink, the building habits of a kroxigor, and rode to battle atop the ferocious carnosaur.Every general since, has lived in the shadow of Huaroq; none have either added to the tactica established by Hauroq, lost a fort OR built a fort, and certainly, none have tamed anything as large as a carnosaur. The story goes, that after all these accomplishments, Huaroq set sights on the northern Rim country, but the Senate would not allow it. Huaroq begged and pleaded, on the Senate floor to lift the border, in hope of ending the seasonal raids once and for all by exterminating the beastmen. The Senate held firm. As a last act, Huaroq appointed a successor; something previously reserved for the senate to vote on. Today we call this the blessing of Huaroq. The last time anyone has seen Huaroq, it was atop that great carnosaur, heading north. The Senate denounced him as a traitor, and put restrictions on the military; this is called the curse of Huaroq. The great general chose to break barriers, not to abandon the city. Some say he is still alive, and I am one of them. Not only haunting the countryside north of the Rim, eating beastmen for every meal, but also in the spirit of war. We owe our wellbeing to the legacy of Huaroq.

    Now for Tadi.

    Tadi is a master flyer, but above all, a master beast tamer. Tadi rides a pair of terradons that do not leave each others side; when one is the mount for battle, the other carries extra supplies. Ever since the twin hatchlings chose him, Tadi has been famous which lead to his meeting the new general at the time, Ahtunowhiho. Shortly thereafter, impressed by Tadi's strength of will and agreeable demeanor, Ahtunowhiho formed the Terradon Corps with Tadi as captain. At Tadi's request, Ahtunowhiho commissioned the network of landing pads at each outpost. Tadi also pushes Ahtunowhiho to incorporate Razordons and Ripperdactlys into the forces, saying that every beast can be tamed. Efforts have been fruitless due to the volatile nature of both beasts, but Tadi still believes in this notion. Tadi has joked that he should retire from the Terradon Corps just to prove that it can be done. That retirement may come earlier than expected as Tadi is frequently AWOL after scouting missions. Ahtunowhiho trusts no one to replace Tadi though, and has not discharged him from duty.
     
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  17. Warden
    Slann

    Warden Tenth Spawning

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    I really like the fluff for your city Poneextlan, especially since it is so different than most of the Lizardmen cities we normally see in the canon. I really enjoy the idea that their are more hidden Lizardmen cities up to the north of Hexoatl and the Isthmus of Pahuax, and thank you for creating one of them! I imagine it might look like some of the cliff-dweller ruins that are all over Arizona and New Mexico, like Mesa Verde and stuff. I am curious if this is sort of the look you are going for (more built up of course since the Lizardmen still live there)

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    Also thank you for the descriptions of your characters, I found them very interesting, especially the part about Huaroq going all Nakai the Wanderer on the beastmen and haunting them in the countryside.
     
  18. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    Gorgeous photos, I've always loved the cliff castles. These would fit right into The Rim perfectly, however, the lizards live in a flat city surrounded by low hills.

    I have room to put some of these in my story, but right now nothing like this has been done by any of the factions. No forts have been created since Huaroq left, maybe Ahtunowhiho will revive the Kroxigor Development Corps (just made that up, I like my groups to sound official) and start building these forts into the cliffs of The Rim.

    Thanks for the kind words =)
     
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  19. Scalenex
    Slann

    Scalenex Keeper of the Indexes Staff Member

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    I pretty much visualized your city to look like the photo. I kind of figured it'd be mountains on one side and flatness on the other. All the attacks on the city come from one direction right? That was the impression I got from your work so far.
     
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  20. Tlac'Natai the Observer
    Cold One

    Tlac'Natai the Observer Active Member

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    I guess I haven't decsribed the city (other than its mood). Poneextlan is in the middle of the desert, with the Rim as one of its borders. Poneextlan is the Winterfell, not Castle Black haha. This is giving me ideas though guys. Ideas that fit right into my plan.
     

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